December 31st, 2007 · No Comments (http://sarcasticgamer.com/wp/index.php/2007/12/21-halo-jesus-freaks.html#comments)

by Doc (http://sarcasticgamer.com/wp/index.php/author/Doc/)


http://sarcasticgamer.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2007/12/countdown-banner27.gif (http://sarcasticgamer.com/wp/index.php/top-100)

http://sarcasticgamer.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2007/12/halojesus.gifHalo fans are some pretty ferocious folks. The mere mention of their blessed game in any context other than extreme praise and worship, brings about a tornado of angry forum posts and comments. Lono found this out first hand, when he had the audacity to write this opinion article.

Halo 3 Multiplayer is Dead (http://sarcasticgamer.com/wp/index.php/2007/09/halo-3-multiplayer-is-dead.html)

From there, he went on to take one of the worst virtual beatings and character assassinations in the 6 month history of Sarcastic Gamer. There’s more.

Then, on Episode 11 of the podcast (http://sarcasticgamer.com/wp/index.php/2007/10/episode-11-got-lono.html), he coined his now famous (in his own mind at least) nickname for the blockbuster, Halo Jesus.

Here’s what happened on the forums. (http://sarcasticgamer.com/forums/showthread.php?t=933)

Like Jesus, Halo 3 is revered the world over as a savior of the universe.

Like Jesus fans, Halo 3 fans defend their deity like… well…. a deity.

Unfortunately, the Halo 3 fans aren’t limited by that whole “do unto others as you would have them do unto you” directive. These people carry rocket launchers. They did unto Lono unlike anything he ever did unto them.
For their undying, blind love of a frickin video game, the Halo 3 Jesus Freaks earn the 21 slot, on our list of the top 100 Gaming Moments of 2007.

Click here for the rest of Sarcastic Gamer’s Top 100 Gaming Moments from 2007 all in one place! (http://sarcasticgamer.com/wp/index.php/top-100)

Halo Jesus is the law!

I actually agree with what you said originally. It is a mad race to best weapons. It's just hard to try and think of a way around it. Of course you could use the Battlefield 2 way and have preset gear, but then I think whether classics like Goldeneye would've worked this way.

Lono, you say you hate it when someone else has the better weapon, but how do you feel when you get it?

It feels good, right up until I get meleed to death.

That applies to everyone then. That sucks balls. I've never played Halo, but the whole thing sounds very familiar.

Yeah, it's like, I can shoot you 20 times with my assault rifle and you won't die, but one jab with the other end of the gun kills you instantly.

That's Master Chief Power.

That's Master Chief Power.

Do not blaspheme St. John 117...

Well, not that part, but the gun rush is familiar. Lol.

That does sound a bit odd, though.

Halo jesus is not "odd" if anything you are the one that is "odd"

Halo jesus is not "odd" if anything you are the one that is "odd"

I meant the ability to kill with melee. Was you offended?

Yes. Yes I was. you have had your warning next time you must repent and then make me a steak or burn at the stake.

He's a witch!

BURN HIM!!!

The one thing I hate about Halo Jesus is that you will most likely get owned if you end up facing more than 1 enemy at a time. Sure you might be able to take down one of them, but the other one will most likely notice you and kill you. You might survive if you have a shotgun, sword, or mauler, but other than that, you will most likely die.

I love that in COD4 you can take down an entire team by yourself if you plan it right. Halo it's almost impossible because of how many bullets it takes to kill someone.

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/articles/view/editorials/zeropunctuation/2304-Zero-Punctuation-Halo-3

Halo Jesus is the lord and savior of all 360s

Last year i convinced my friend (a big Xbox fan) to get HL2 for his PC. Once he'd played it, he admitted that it was far better than Halo. Hopefully with the release of orange box, 360 owners will start to realise that Halo isn't the center of the universe :P

It is the center of the universe. The sun got a lower score by gamespot than Halo Jesus.

Oh, dear Halo Jesus, thank you,

You are such a good Halo Jesus to us.

A kind and gentle and accommodating Halo Jesus, and we thank You

Oh sweet, sweet Lord of hosts for the multiplayer You have so aptly laid at our television this day.

And each day, by day, day by day, by day

Oh dear Halo Jesus three things we pray
To love Thee more dearly,
To see Thee more clearly,
To follow Thee more nearly, day, by day, by day. Amen.

Oh, dear Halo Jesus, thank you, you are such a good Halo Jesus to us. A kind and gentle and accommodating Halo Jesus, and we thank You oh sweet, sweet Lord of hosts for the multiplayer You have so aptly laid at our television this day, and each day, by day, day by day, by day oh dear Halo Jesus three things we pray to love Thee more dearly, to see Thee more clearly, to follow Thee more nearly, day, by day, by day. Amen.
I think we may need an exorcist for this one.

That was just a tad over the line. i got my sig thingy from sloganizer.com just type in Halo Jesus its awesome

He's a witch!

BURN HIM!!!


Let the witch hunt begin! Down with all heretics that curse the name of Halo, the holy trinity!

Halo Jesus, thank you for this fine website, amen.

hey, can someone fill me in on why it's called Halo Jesus? I went out to iTunes to grab ep 11, but it wasn't there.

hey, can someone fill me in on why it's called Halo Jesus? I went out to iTunes to grab ep 11, but it wasn't there.

Its called Halo Jesus because of all the hype :w00t: But Bungie forgot to make it deep :sad::angry:

http://blogs.dasmirnov.net/media/halo%20holy%20combat.jpg
I had to!

all praise its holy haloness!!!

http://blogs.dasmirnov.net/media/halo%20holy%20combat.jpg
I had to!

It was bound to happen.

[B]http://sarcasticgamer.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2007/12/halojesus.gif

that looks like AcesHigh's avatar! :lol: